THE ORDER OF OPERATIONS

There may be no phrase that immediately transports you back to grade school math class faster than this one: "Please excuse my dear Aunt Sally." That mnemonic device helped many elementary-aged kids, me included, learn and remember math’s order of operations. The order of operations concept is simple. Doing important math work correctly requires you to follow certain rules of precedence. First, do this. Once you've taken care of the first step, then you can move on. Once that’s done, then the next. If - and only if - you follow the steps, then you’ll get the outcome you're after.

If you’re working to raise and develop champion athletes and young people today, either as a parent or a coach, I want you to remember the lessons you learned from your elementary school math teacher and your dear Aunt Sally. I want you to see clearly today that helping your kids achieve the winning results you want for them requires some serious work. And here, like it was in elementary math class, it’s important to understand and follow the order of operations. There are certain rules of precedence in this area, too. If - and only if - you follow the steps, then you’ll get the outcome you're after.

Here's the order of operations. First, you relentlessly work to help your child become a champion. You teach, train, and equip them to do what champions do. You cultivate their heart and their commitment for playing. You build their toughness, their courage, and their coachability. You develop in them a passion for improvement and a sense of selflessness and sacrifice. You promote their positive attitude.

That's step one. It's embracing the daily work that helping your child become a champion requires. It's committing to the long, slow process of helping them become their best. It's recognizing the lessons that today’s experience provides and using them to help your young athlete learn, grow, and improve. It's encouraging them, challenging them, supporting them, and holding them accountable to a high standard of winning behavior. It's clarifying the choices and eventually helping them build habits that will set them apart. It's modeling for them what it looks like to act, to compete, and to behave like a champion yourself. It's doing the work it takes - today and every day - to help them become someone worthy of winning.

When you do all that – when you do the work it takes to help your child become a champion – then you’ll get the results you’re after. Then your child will win championships. Then they’ll get the recognition they deserve, the role they’re after, or the trophy they’ve been chasing. Your child can get all those things you want for them, but only if you follow the order of operations. It’s the process that leads to the intended result. 

Your child won’t win, and then start doing all the things champions do. They won’t win and then love the game or give their best or overcome adversity or seek improvement. They’ll do what winners do first – they’ll learn how to get coached, how to be a great teammate, how to take risks, and how to choose a positive attitude – and then they’ll reap the rewards after. That's the order of operations. That's the formula for achieving your desired outcome.

We all want to win, and as parents and coaches, we all want to see our kids win, too. Just don’t allow yourself to forget the reality of what real, authentic success requires. First you become a champion. Then you win championships. Embrace the process of helping your kids become their best, and commit to using whatever happens today to help them take another step toward their full potential. That's what it takes to get the outcome you're after. That's how it works for everyone. For you, for your child. Even for your dear Aunt Sally.